Barista making cappuccino I have a sublime beginning to my day. My husband brings a perfectly brewed café latte to me in bed. He also brings the i-Pad and my glasses. Whilst sipping the delicious coffee I read the Sydney Morning Herald. A short time ago I was reading Richard Glover’s column and in no time I was laughing at his reminiscences and at the differences between today and days gone by.

The one that started me laughing was his line ‘waking up and picking lint from his navel’. I did that too when I was a child and I can only think it was because we slept in flannelette sheets.

I couldn’t get the lines out of my head. They swam around like a chorus and I began to think of some of my own. I have set these out below and if you have any from your day perhaps you would share them with Fifty Five Plus.

Kids without pockets had hankies pinned to their jumpers.

Home Entertainment was singing round the piano.

Braces were to hold trousers up not to put on teeth.

Grass was mown not smoked.

3d Tap with giant dripOne tap meant cold water not a mixer system.

Vegetables were dirty and needed to be washed.

Fish got scaled and gutted.

Fowl got plucked and cleaned.

We had baths and not showers.

Speed was the rate at which you drove your car.

Everyone had an older relative in their dotage.

Jumpers got ripped out and reknitted.

Exercise was not in a gym with weights. Women walked to the shops and carried home heavy bags.

Exercise for men was the push mower and the hedge clippers.

Cleaning power was in the elbow not out of a socket.

Children’s parties meant learning a poem to say (known as a party piece).

Collars and cuffs got turned.In unity is strength

Socks were darned and shoes were heeled and soled.

Faggots were small sticks for lighting the fire.

Dykes held back water.

Kids caught buses or walked to sport nobody got a lift and nobody came to watch.

Babies came with the stork or from under gooseberry bushes.

Parents friends were called Auntie or Uncle and everyone else Mr Miss or Mrs.

Air was via an open window and heating from an open fire.

Rockers were chairs for lulling babies to sleep.

Sophisticated women smoked cigarettes, educated men pipes and bosses cigars.

Pets were treated at home and buried in the back garden.Grave in the forest

Sleep over meant getting up late not having a bunch of friends to stay over.

A special children’s treat at a grown up party was Advocat and Lucozade. (Yuk)

Cranking the car was a winter woe.??????????

Guitars sported G-Strings.

Strippers removed paint.  

To read Richard Glovers article please go to: